Where the Guac meets my middle finger

I’m ranting about Burger King today. Not for the obvious reason that their food sucks, is disgusting, and is largely unfit for human consumption. That’s a whole other story.

I got a promotional mailer from BK (How the heck did I, a nutritionist, get on their mailing list? Wrong target market, people!) promoting the *new* “California Whopper.” The tagline reads: Guac meets the Grill.

So listen, I’m all about guacamole. Personally, I’d slather that stuff all over my body and eat it every day if I was that kind of person. Avocados are delicious, creamy, and chock full o’ nutrients and amazingly healthy fats. But what friggin’ pisses me off is when companies, like Burger King, exploit my beloved guacamole (and just an FYI: Subway has done the same thing). These companies think that if they slop on some guacamole, the public will think that their burgers have become a healthy item.

Furthermore, I am REALLY not digging the fact that their California Whopper logo features  a bounty fresh tomatoes, avocados, and limes which make it seem as though this burger is a bit healthier. But of course, this is BK, and this burger doesn’t merely have guacamole. Oh, no, they didn’t stop there. It also has swiss cheese, mayo and BACON (I can hear myself getting fatter.) WTF does guacamole, swiss, and bacon have to do with California? NOTHING!

When you think of California, perhaps you think palm trees, sunshine, exceptionally beautiful and fit people running around in hardly any clothes engaging in sports. Well, BK is hoping that’s what you imagine, however I highly doubt that you’d fit into that image after eating one of these monstrosities.

Just for shits and giggles, here’s how BK describes their new creation (and FYI, I love how they say all the ingredients “collide.” Yeah, collide on my ass!):

With the new California WHOPPER® Sandwich, the full-taste flavors of guacamole, swiss cheese and bacon collide! A ¼ pound* of Flame-broiled beef topped with ripe tomatoes, crisp lettuce, guacamole, crispy bacon, melted Swiss cheese, creamy mayo and onions all on a toasted sesame seed bun. *Based on pre-cooked patty weight. Limited time only. At participating restaurants

Thus sucka will set you back 820 calories, 56g fat, 18g saturated fat, 50g carbs, and 1400mg sodium. That’s a crime.

What do you think about this new burger? Do you think the name “California Whopper” is deceptive? Anyone know how to get me off this mailing list??

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One Response to Where the Guac meets my middle finger

  1. Lauren Slayton August 31, 2011 at 7:56 am #

    They are pimping out the avocado and it makes me crazy. I think you should send them your comments.

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